Thoughts for Julie-More than you need/asked for

I think you're right on the money with the thought that going back to something familiar has its comfort, but having a baby at 25 versus 40 will be a big difference. Emerson arrived when I was 43 and I'm just not able to do the things I did with Carter. Of course part of it has to do with the fact that Emerson isn't as easy going as Carter was and my patience isn't what it was 8 years earlier either. I don't regret our decision regarding Emerson. I can't imagine our lives without him and don't feel that I could ever tell anyone not to have children if that is what they really want to do. Just be aware of the major hurdles that await. We all seem to remember the good part, and forget the struggles. Not having your husband on board is a major obstacle as well as having him travel. Been, there, done that (the travel part that is). Not fun which is why I'm working full time now and Jim is at home. Our kids have reached an age when they don't need us like they did in the past, but as grown up as they like to act, they do need us even if it is just in the shadows.

I think the "what are you going to do with your life" thoughts have to do with the age you are approaching. The way I figure it, we've got another 40 years to figure that out. I'm not in a hurry. I remember having to fill out a form for a high school reunion and one of the questions was to list your most important accomplishment (this was a 5 year reunion, I believe). I wrote, "I haven't accomplished it yet". I guess I still feel that way.

The anti-social feelings make me think you may be a bit depressed as well which is totally understandable. Quitting the restaurant is a turning point in your life since you had so much time invested and it was obviously draining based on your posts. I hope you get passed this part. It's not a fun place to be.

I like Carole's thought that challenging yourself provides self esteem and morale. We all need positive reinforcement and unfortunately, it usually comes from outside the home.

Keep us posted, Julie. We know you'll get through this.

Brenda